BATMAN & ROBIN: LET’S LOOK SERIOUSLY AT A SERIOUSLY STUPID MOVIE

Only within the last year or two have I come to genuinely enjoy this movie. Despite becoming a bit of a fan of the film I can without question admit that it is the worst Batman project ever. Far worse than the old serials, Batman Forever or Batman V Superman. I know cinema quite well and even though I am entertained by something, that does not make it a masterpiece. These days I certainly do prefer this one even more than the Christopher Nolan trilogy just because I'm into more light hearted fare, but Nolan blows Schumacher out of the water...no argument. The reason I want to stand up for this movie and perhaps get you to take another look at it is because I think what Schumacher TRIED to do was absolutely brilliant. Everything sounded great on paper, but his overall plan just failed miserably! We saw the first 2 darker Burton entries get lightened up a bit in Batman Forever. Much more color was welcomed in and the villains, while still dangerous, spent a bit more time on goofing around. There's no doubt that Joel Schumacher was always a fan of the old Adam West series. No real surprise as if you claim you are a Batman fan and you don't like the Adam West series I got news for you...you're not a Batman fan. Well, as director he was trying to remake the darker movie series into the Adam West series. Things he had just hinted at in Batman Forever, he went balls out on with this sequel. Uma Thurman's over the top performance is not only the showpiece of the film, but it's also something you'd see in the old Batman TV show except with Louie The Lilac instead of Poison Ivy. Mr. Freeze actually has a frozen hideout with snow and ice related goons who are forced to sing along with wintery Christmas songs. He even has an ice sexpot in Vivica A. Fox! This is everything the old 1960's TV series did in every episode. When they did it 9 times out of 10 it worked, but Mr. Schumacher tried and fell flat on his face. I've heard this called by some the worst movie ever made (oh come on). I've also heard people call this the worst comic book movie ever made (Man Thing from 2005 has to take that title). I'm not saying you should be praising this nonsensical flick, but I do think it calls for a reevaluation.
   None of the film is played out very seriously. Yes, Alfred is dying and Uma spouts endless sexual innuendo, but overall it feels more like a movie for the kids. Whereas Batman Forever felt very much like a comic book from the 1980s, Batman & Robin feels more like a comic book from the 1960s. Uma Thurman's initial scene of "he's never let me into his lab...let me go into his lab now that the viewers are watching" is straight out of old comic books. When she enters that lab Bane is extremely comic bookish even having some veins painted onto his arms. Mr. Freeze's mode of escape costs more than the diamond he is trying to steal just like you'd see in the Adam West show or in the comics of that same era. I remember reading really old Batman comics with my brother and pointing out to him that Joker would spend a million dollars to steal something worth 50 grand. It was comic books, it wasn't trying to be reality and that's exactly what this movie is all about. I mean a Batman credit card with it's own cash register sound effect? That's another thing, the Looney Tunes like sound effects had to give some hints to people that they weren't trying to do drama here. You hear empty coconut like bonks, swishes, swirls and noises I can't even explain other than to say "you know the sound from that cartoon where Wile E. Coyote falls". There's also a quip or a pun delivered by some character every two minutes! I mean people took this as a serious piece of work? Need I remind you yet again of that Batman credit card?
   I think many fans of the more serious Burton films just missed the point and didn't want to see Batman revert back to being a bit campy. At the time I didn't either, but now I've come to appreciate it for what it was at least trying to be. Outside of that I can't give you a ton of positive cinematic qualities. I do think George Clooney makes a great Bruce Wayne even if he doesn't make a great Batman. I think his chemistry with Chris O'Donnell is a little better than Val Kilmer's (I hear Kilmer can be difficult to work with). The real positive however is Thurman as Poison Ivy. Out of all the actors, she seemed to best understand what Joel Schumacher was trying to do. She does over the top and PG rated sex appeal to the same lengths as Julie Newmar did back in the 60s. She's a colorful character and she is just a blast to watch. I'd also point out that having the same actors play Alfred and Commissioner Gordon throughout the ever changing four part series does help hold it all together.
   The cinematic negatives though I could go on for pages and pages. No one who worked on this film understands how ice works. No one understood basic scientific principles like gravity and physics. I mean that door surfing from 30,000 feet nonsense is the biggest load of crap I've ever witnessed in a film and not even Adam West and Burt Ward would have portrayed something this stupid and poor looking. The movie itself is unfocused and jumps from scene to scene with all of this exposition and even action sequences that have almost nothing to do with the story. They could have dropped 30 minutes of these scenes and still come in slightly over 90 minutes. I think movie goers would have appreciated the film a lot more and even if they hated it they would not complain as much as 90 minutes is a lot less painful than 125! So why do I like it? Part of it is just loving the four part series as a whole. Another is liking most of the actors and crew. More than both of those things, I appreciate Schumacher's love for the old campy Batman and his attempt to bring some of that back into the mythos of this legendary character that really didn't become a legend until he had a TV show that showed him as a fun character. Something else that really helped persuade me to see this film in a different light were my buddies over at Rifftrax. I thought the riff was so funny that I have probably watched it over 100 times! When I watch the non-Rifftrax version I still laugh out loud at what I'm seeing on the screen and I think that is the way it was somewhat intended to be. If you think of this movie more along the lines of The Room than The Dark Knight you'll be pleasantly surprised and perhaps you'll even get some genuine enjoyment from Batman & Robin as I do every time I watch it...
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